Trevor attacks.

Soooooo basically... last night was terrifying. I decided to go to bed early. An hour later I was still awake because I have no life and basically troll blogs and play Farmville all day, so I got up to pee. Which was stupid.

There was a giant 2 inch long cockroach in the bathroom.

Which is SOOO not fun to discover when your peeing.

This is the conversation I had with myself:
Me: Finish peeing or run out screaming with no pants?
Myself: Finish peeing.
I: RUNNNNNN!! Its a fucking cockroach you crazy!!

I did, in fact, finish. By which point I was hyperventilating and in all out freak-out mode. Bugs are really up there on my list of shit-that-I-never-want-to-see-while-peeing. Or ever for that matter. Cockroaches are just under butterflies on the scary bugs list. Oh yeah, and btw, I like lists.
What was I talking about?
Oh yeah...

So I ran across the hall to my friends' dorm, and basically ran in and started squeaking and jumping in circles.
I'm pretty sure I sounded like a bat.
It went something along the lines of OHMYGODTHERESACOCKROACHINTHEBATHROOM!MANDAMAKEITGOAWAY!!
And Manda went into the bathroom to look at the offending alienbug.
Then promptly ran out again.

I went to the older girls on my floor to see if they had a guy in their room to get the bug OUT.
They did not, but one almost threw up.
Then my lovely RA decided to tell us that if you squish a cockroach you get tapeworms from its stomach.

Long story short, we found a guy with a big boot to kill it. Then suite-mate Caro and I cleaned up the bathroom. She picked up the remaining bits with a giant trash bag on her arm, and I mopped.
It was icky.
Just saying.

Anyways, apparently my RA lied, and you can't get tapeworms from cockroaches unless you basically eat them raw... Which is good I guess.

Oh, and my roommate decided to name the cockroach Trevor.
Needless to say, he did not get a funeral.

Now to find out how the hell he got in there...