Uhm... eww?

Okay, so I was going to write some amazing post here [probably] but then I got grossed out. You know when you click Next Blog>> at the top of the page and it takes you to some blog it thinks is related? Lately I have gotten gay sex, infertility, submission, and porn as my genres. WTF!? What am I saying on here that leaves people to believe my blog has ANY of that? And if it did, it would be much more popular. HA. Well... Ew.

Things I Want to Take Behind the Middle School and Get Pregnant

I don't mean that literally. It means things that I love, but I like this title better. I got the idea from my male, asian alter ego. It basically rocks. And so does he, go look at him.

1. Glee. 'Nuff said. Except for there wasn't, because almost nothing I could say could capture the vast awesomeness that is Glee.

2. Smoothies. They basically need their own food group. Since I got to college, they are my dietary staple. They are so so so so so good. In fact I'm going to go get one soon with Manda, who lives across the hall.

3. Flip flops. Especially the ones from Old Navy. I have every color and wear them everywhere until it snows. And even sometimes I do then too. I'd rather be barefoot, but most people frown upon walking around wth no shoes on a college campus. And in downtown Seattle, because if you don't wear shoes there it means your a hobo. And they chase you. But I have no experience with that. Nope... None...

4. Stuffed animals. I don't know why, but they make me happy.

5. Hershey's Chocolate Bar with almonds. They are like heaven in a wrapper. I can eat them by the case. Or at least I think I could.

6. Hand sanitizer. I hate it when my hands smell. Or feel dirty. Or anything like that. I use it religiously. I love it, and always have it with me.

7. Mechanical pencils. Remember when you actually had to get up and walk across the room when you broke your pencil. Or... *GASP*... actually sharpen one by hand with those tiny ones, that sometimes came in ironic ways. [Like a nose. I saw one of those today and just about died laughing.]

8. Garmin. Or any other GPS unit. I get lost a lot. I also get lost easily. Simple directions are much too hard for my little brain to handle. I'm right brained** so I am more artistic. Describe the tree where I need to turn, not the street. I am so not good with streets. I also do not know my left from right most of the time. I have this strange bump I have had since forever on my middle left finger from writing and thats the only way I can tell. Wow run on sentence. GPS is basically made for people like me. Except it kind of feels condesending occasionally... Why can't it be in, like... Mr. Roger's voice. I loved that guy. And he was never condesending. Ever. And wore cardigans. Which are amazing.

9. Whipped cream. And not in a dirty way. I can eat this stuff with a spoon. Some people think that's gross, but it is not. Whipped cream is thebest man made substance ever. I love it to death.

10. The number 13. It's my favorite number. Always has been. Plus, supersticious (sp?) people think it's evil, which rocks. :] Oh wait, there is a reason I love it, but it's a very sad story and shall be saved for a sad day.

**I just had to run across the hall and ask Manda which side of the brain was artistic. I'm that cool.

Stuff you should probably know about me, except you probably don't care.

I figured that since no one is reading this anyways, I'd write about myself.

I grew up in Everett, WA. Which is basically a little gang town north of Seattle. It's also a convergence zone. Which means it rains all the effing time. Yeah, it sucked, but I love it and can't wait to go back this Christmas.

I'm a spelling nazi. I always correct everyone. All the time. I can't help it. It's impossible not to. I blame my sister. She's basically a human dictionary. You hear that, Moo? Your fault.

I swear like a f*cking sailor. I have since I was 8 and my best friend Kayla taught me how. I try to stop, then I get really frustrated and give up. Yeah, I'm a quitter. Get over it.

I like boys. A lot. Even though I haven't had a boyfriend in basically forever. I want one, but they sadly do not want me back.

I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. Everyone says to do what you love and to try to make money off of it, but I love too much. I love animals, and sleep, and babies, and baby animals, and singing, and preforming, and design, and the tv show Bones. It's too hard to choose. I think i'm going to be an anthropology major, with a possible double in international studies. But i'm not sure. It's too hard. How are we supposed to choose what to do with the rest of our lives at 18? It's ridiculous. I don't even know what I want to eat for breakfast tomorrow. I'm very indecisive. It's not a good quality.

I'm rude. And in your face. And honest, brutally so. And a bitch. I would have put that first but i don't think putting bitch in bold is a great idea. Because of the children, damnit. :]

Sorry this post kinda sucked, but I thought I should get that out of the way.

Trevor attacks.

Soooooo basically... last night was terrifying. I decided to go to bed early. An hour later I was still awake because I have no life and basically troll blogs and play Farmville all day, so I got up to pee. Which was stupid.

There was a giant 2 inch long cockroach in the bathroom.

Which is SOOO not fun to discover when your peeing.

This is the conversation I had with myself:
Me: Finish peeing or run out screaming with no pants?
Myself: Finish peeing.
I: RUNNNNNN!! Its a fucking cockroach you crazy!!

I did, in fact, finish. By which point I was hyperventilating and in all out freak-out mode. Bugs are really up there on my list of shit-that-I-never-want-to-see-while-peeing. Or ever for that matter. Cockroaches are just under butterflies on the scary bugs list. Oh yeah, and btw, I like lists.
What was I talking about?
Oh yeah...

So I ran across the hall to my friends' dorm, and basically ran in and started squeaking and jumping in circles.
I'm pretty sure I sounded like a bat.
It went something along the lines of OHMYGODTHERESACOCKROACHINTHEBATHROOM!MANDAMAKEITGOAWAY!!
And Manda went into the bathroom to look at the offending alienbug.
Then promptly ran out again.

I went to the older girls on my floor to see if they had a guy in their room to get the bug OUT.
They did not, but one almost threw up.
Then my lovely RA decided to tell us that if you squish a cockroach you get tapeworms from its stomach.

Long story short, we found a guy with a big boot to kill it. Then suite-mate Caro and I cleaned up the bathroom. She picked up the remaining bits with a giant trash bag on her arm, and I mopped.
It was icky.
Just saying.

Anyways, apparently my RA lied, and you can't get tapeworms from cockroaches unless you basically eat them raw... Which is good I guess.

Oh, and my roommate decided to name the cockroach Trevor.
Needless to say, he did not get a funeral.

Now to find out how the hell he got in there...

No Experience Whatsoever?

Hey, ya'll.
I've never blogged before, so sorry in advance for sucking.
I have basically no life experience.
At all.
I enjoy the spacebar far too much, obviously.
I hope you like me?